


After Living Alone For So Many Years

by orphan_account



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: 1960s, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, New York City, On the Run
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:41:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22676557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: He's leaving home.Something inside, that was always denied, for so many years.He's leaving home
Relationships: John Lennon/Paul McCartney, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 37





	After Living Alone For So Many Years

**Author's Note:**

> i liked this one,, i hope you guys like this one  
> kinda an across the universe au but kinda
> 
> takes place 1967-1973

John is 20 when he decides to run away.

He graduated from school two years ago and his parents scream and rage about their love. How unhappy his mother is and how hurtful his father's words are.

He's imagined of New York, dreamed of the big city in his small bed in his suffocating town. So that's where he decides to go. 

John walks and walks, he asks for directions, rides with strangers, and is almost attacked by a group of thugs. John ends up in Vegas and heads east in a car with two women who forget he's in there at night when they wake him with songs of pleasure and dances of delight during his sleep. They drop him off in Missouri, then leave for Nebraska. 

When he's in Illinois, he stays longer then expected. He meets a boy with soft features and a permanent frown living in a run down apartment with his deadbeat father and his mess of a younger brother. His name is is Paul. Paul goes to school and comes back home and goes to his room and lays awake and wonders. He wonders all day long about starting over. Then the cycle repeats. He's only 18.

"My father drinks himself to sleep and my brother barely speaks to us."

"Come with me to New York, then."

"I can't."

John stays in a motel for another 3 weeks trying to convince Paul. 

John stays up late at night thinking about how his father must feel about him leaving, thinks about whether or not his mother cries for his disappearance, thinks about how Paul's arm seemed purple and his jaw looked blue.

"If you come with me, I won't let anyone hurt you." 

Paul looks him in the eyes and John notices how dull and lifeless they are in the sun, then Paul turns and begins to pack his clothes into a large bag. He packs his favorite shirts, his favorite vinyls, his journals, and his guitar with his mother's name on the back.

"That's lovely. The only thing my mother gave me was bipolar disorder." 

Paul smiled at that, the corners of his mouth reaching his eyes.

It's late at night when they sneak out. Paul's father passed out on the couch and his brother nowhere to be seen. John waits for Paul outside and when he joins the older boy, he has a set of keys in his hands.

They make it to Indiana in Paul's dad's car.

When they stop in Ohio for a break and for gas, Paul finally has his first kiss in a smelly room with bullet holes in the walls. Paul's never felt such joy, his heart on fire with lust, hands twitching around John's shoulders.

John hasn't felt this way since the first time he held hands with Cynthia Powell in the 7th grade.

His lips moving against Paul's as their hands touch and pull each other closer. 

They're still not ready to become one, but this is enough. They both fall asleep under the stained sheets.

They're so close to New York they can almost taste it. It's been 3 months since John left and 5 weeks for Paul. The small border from Pennsylvania to New York is such a short distance.

This time they don't stop, they keep going until they're in Yonkers. A few more hours and they've made it.

They've made it to The Big Apple.

John doesn't realise how far from home he is and all Paul thinks about is home, that is until they make their own home. 

They find an apartment and a woman who rents out a room to them. The building is huge and their portion has many rooms, which have also been rented out to others.

Their landlord is a short, older, asian women with long, thick, black hair named Yoko. She's ingenious and artful and knowing. She's intelligent and rents them one room with one bed.  
She's knowing.

Eight other people live on their floor, some have their own rooms while others share. Some have two beds, others have one. 

They meet a boy the same age as Paul. George. He's quiet and shy, but has eyes brighter than any light. Yet he's stuck in a cloud of detachment and John can't find a better word to describe him other than utterly lost. He left his home in Maine to come join the dreamers here. There are nights where gentle weeping could be heard through the walls of his bedroom mixed in with Yoko's soothing words.

Stuart and Astrid were just as interesting and mysterious. They were the same as John and Paul, glued to the hip, never leaving one's side. Astrid was a photographer and Stuart a painter. They were from Germany, moving to America with their close and talented friend, Klaus, to start a bohemian life away from the loudness and troubles of Hamburg. 

Maureen and Pattie reminded John of the women who took him from Sin City. Lovely women who slept in one bed and couldn't stop their wandering fingers. They had soft voices yet loud looks. They shared a room with a Olivia, a tall, dark women who would sneak her way into Yoko's privacy during night time.

Richard is a starr. He's as old as John but a little less mature. He has sad eyes but he's far from it. He loves with his mind and smiles with his heart, makes everyone feel more special than they did before. He's one of the only people living here who belonged in both places of his life, wearing his mothers jewels on his soft hands. Richie takes care of the others the same way his mother had, George being his first priority.

John and Paul feel welcomed, they fit in, they're loved. People come and go from this home, new people coming in for acceptance. In their life, they've loved them all. 

Months into their stay and Paul's birthday is coming up. He's 19 when he gives up his body to John, merging their bodies together, becoming intimate for the first time. It's bright colors and waves of joy.

Everything is ok. There are some hiccups when in an unknown city.  
George leaves to the hospital for a bit, he leaves his bright eyes and doesn't come back until his mind has found it's way. Please don't be long.

They all send him letters and get-well-soons, Ringo and Astrid visit him the most. John rarely visits. Doesn't understand why someone would do what little Georgie has done. He's too cowardly to see him, so Paul does the comforting for the both of them.

Another month passes and George is home but is locked in his own world. He only let's Richie in. 

Their lives are kept secret by the open minded who stop by. Paul teaches John guitar and John teaches Paul how to write down feelings through thoughts. They make love through music and harmonies, their sound providing George security and bringing life to those around. 

"If I fell..."

"All my loving..."

"Two of us..."

A year goes by and John and Paul are now John&Paul. 

They're never tired of one another. 

Stuart and Astrid share a ring, Pattie and Maureen share a life, everyone around shares love.

When John has his off-days, he can't lift his soul from his body and his body from his mind. He locks doors and shuts others out, lies in darkness and wishes to go away. Paul learns to understand and gives him time. 

On his worst days, John asks George about his accident.

"How was it?"

"Hurt."

"What...did it smell like?"

"It smelled like flowers and apples, sweet and bright like sunshine."

"But.."

"But it feels like burning and darkness, a long cold lonely winter. Like the light is taken from the ones you love instead of you."

John stares at Paul's face when he's asleep and finds that he'd rather be here than take away his light. 

When Paul has his off-days, he tortures his guitar until Yoko bangs on the walls, then he plays louder. He cries in his sleep and holds John tight, fearing his lover will disappear. Wakes up in a cold sweat to the sound of music and his mother. 

He likes to stay out and drink until he can't remember anyone's name, he loves the burn and the forgetfulness. He goes out with Stuart and Klaus to small clubs dancing with colors and comes home to a dark house.

They both pull each other up when their eyes are devoid of light. They give each other their own even when they need it more. They're in the middle. 

There's a storm in their love. Sometimes lightning strikes and thunder rumbles, sometimes there's only grey skies. Sometimes, there's nothing because they stop sleeping in the same room, but that's only happened twice. Usually though, the sun always shines through the clouds and brightens their peace. There's rain and they don't mind.

There's a war protest happening down town near Central Park. It was Yoko and John's idea to go help fight for the cause. They made plain white signs with black bold letters, 'WAR IS OVER', and at the bottom in smaller font, 'IF YOU WANT IT'. Pattie and Ringo made their posters vibrant with peace signs surrounding their words, 'LOVE NOT WAR'. 

Once at the protest, they begin to march, their pride holding their signs high, Paul and George passing out sunflowers as an act of peace and care.

In the center of the event, the crowd plays music and sings to the coppers surrounding them. 

John and Paul dance through the crowds of challenge and prudence. Yes, people stare, but most don't care. They're too busy screaming out their own thoughts and knowledge, their disfavor and opinions. But they show their love more, the protesters show signs with love, hand out roses and yellow blossoms of peace on green stems, 'LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED' and it makes John realize, if love is all you need, why can't they have this love? So he sings, and he dances. He does it for Paul. Paul, his love and his world. Nothing can change his world.

When they leave, flowers and dark skies, speech and protest signs are all they see.

"Your my sun and my moon, Macca."

"Your my heart and my soul, Johnny."

When they left home it was just like starting over, lives changed for the better. They don't talk about how their families must feel, how Mike is probably living Paul's past life, they don't talk about how alone John's mother must feel from his father's absence and now his. They don't talk about how they might fall apart one day, but just plan for the future as if they never will.

"We should get married."

"Who'd marry us?"

"..I know, but...Lets do it, babe. I'll wear the dress and-and you can wear the dress, we'll all wear a fucking dress!" 

And Paul laughs. Laughs at John's absurdity and eagerness. Laughs to erase his nerves of the future. 

Paul dreams of fields of strawberries and endless rain that night. John dreams of kaleidoscope eyes and fools on hills. They feel fine.

Their long into their relationship and John starts to wonder.

He still can’t figure out why Paul has stayed, so he asks. And Paul's answer is simple,  
"Because I love you."  
And that's that.

"I loved you yesterday, today, and tomorrow."

"Here, there, and everywhere."

"Exactly."

John looks into Paul's eyes, sees how clear and full of life they are now compared to when they first met. They made a right choice, John decides.

Life goes by. George hasn't shown up since the protest three months ago, having run off into the crowd. Ringo following right after a month later. Mo and Pattie have found their own little house, their own haven. Stuart and Astrid leave for London, awaiting the small patter of tiny feet, Klaus returns to Germany, meeting Jürgen Vollmer, a quiet man with soft features and love for all things beautiful. Yoko and Olivia stay together in the apartments, ready to greet the new runaways who pass by.

And as John and Paul lay in bed, awaiting their new adventure, John turns to Paul, kissing his drooping eyelids.

"Tomorrow morning, we need to pack our bags,"

Paul looks at him, a confused look in his eyes. He moves his hands up and cups John's face.

"What do you mean love?"

John stares closely at his lover's face, his beautiful, handsome face. Eyes like hazel twinkling in the moonlight, cherry red lips, small button nose. John's in love.

"For our new experience, love, what do you think about Paris?"

Paul laughs.

John is 26 when he decides to run away.

Paul is 24 when he chases right after.

**Author's Note:**

> when i had attempted suicide, everything smelled sweet and like apples and flowers which is why i added it,, y'know like a deep moment,,
> 
> i hope you enjoyed it :))


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